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Can you mourn a Grandma you never met? - Horse Genetics Game - Dev Forum
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Can you mourn a Grandma you never met?
  • Back story. I'm adopted. Located my biological parents a year ago. Have managed to meet up with my bio mum, half siblings and grandmum. Have not yet met up with my da and his side of the family though we were trying to arrange something for next month for my/his birthday. I was so excited because it meant meeting him, his wife, daughters and my grandma.

    Just found out grandma passed on to her next grand adventure in the wee hours of the morning today. I don't know the protocol for this, am I allowed to mourn someone I've never met or talked too? Or is that seen as bad form?

    Oh... Merry Christmas Eve to those who celebrate Christmas.
    God grant me the hbs to buy the ponies I need,
    The fortitude to resist the shiny ones I truly don't,
    And the wisdom to know there will always be more next time.
    Shield Maiden. Chiari Warrior. Sometime Equestrian. *47002*
    Tir Na Nog Stables - Home of Hooligans, Shenanigans and Mischief. Purveyor of Oddball RS. Hoarder of A Rhythm Of Fours.
  • However you feel about the situation is completely valid - nobody (who isn't a total jerk) is going to tell you you aren't allowed. If you didn't feel any particular way about her passing, that would be normal and ok. Feeling sad about her passing is also completely normal and ok - you may not have met her, but she's family and that means something.

    I'm sorry for your loss, CeffylDwr. I wish the best things for you, and that you find peace. @};-
  • I am not adopted, but my mom's dad passed when she was little so I never meet him. I still get a little sad I didn't get a chance to know him. Your feelings are valid and no one can or should tell you how to, or how not to feel.
    Thanked by 1CeffylDwr
  • Even if you are mourning a missed opportunity more than a formed relationship, no one can or should tell you how to feel. I'm sorry for your loss.
    45140
    Thanked by 1CeffylDwr
  • This is one of those situations where no one can tell you how to feel, and anyone who tries to needs to take a good hard look at themselves. While you never met her, you are most certainly mourning over the lost chances to meet her, spend time with her, and get to hear the stories I’m sure she would have had to share. This is the hardest time to lose someone, whether you knew them well or only know of them through other people. So while you might not mourn in the traditional fashion (I’ll miss her cooking, family trips, etc) you are mourning in your own way, and that is 100% valid.

    My thoughts and prayers are with you during this difficult time, and I’m very sorry for your loss.
    Thanked by 1CeffylDwr
  • Your feelings are always valid, of course you are “allowed” to mourn.
    Light and positive energy to you~
    Thanked by 1CeffylDwr
  • Thank you every one <3
    God grant me the hbs to buy the ponies I need,
    The fortitude to resist the shiny ones I truly don't,
    And the wisdom to know there will always be more next time.
    Shield Maiden. Chiari Warrior. Sometime Equestrian. *47002*
    Tir Na Nog Stables - Home of Hooligans, Shenanigans and Mischief. Purveyor of Oddball RS. Hoarder of A Rhythm Of Fours.
  • *hugs* Sorry for your loss, Ceffyl.

    As for mourning, who cares if it's allowed? To paraphrase a really smart guy, I do not hold to that. I aim to misbehave.
    Justa ~ ID# 44842
    A chronic sufferer of shiny pony syndrome breeding for DP, Pearl, Brown, Nexus, and Watercolor in Appaloosa, Dun, Sabino 2, and Kit M patterns.
    "God grant me the hbs to buy the ponies I need,
    The fortitude to resist the shiny ones I truly don't,
    And the wisdom to know there will always be more next time."
    Thanked by 1CeffylDwr
  • @JustaSaddletramp Shiny. Thank you
    God grant me the hbs to buy the ponies I need,
    The fortitude to resist the shiny ones I truly don't,
    And the wisdom to know there will always be more next time.
    Shield Maiden. Chiari Warrior. Sometime Equestrian. *47002*
    Tir Na Nog Stables - Home of Hooligans, Shenanigans and Mischief. Purveyor of Oddball RS. Hoarder of A Rhythm Of Fours.
  • Justa ~ ID# 44842
    A chronic sufferer of shiny pony syndrome breeding for DP, Pearl, Brown, Nexus, and Watercolor in Appaloosa, Dun, Sabino 2, and Kit M patterns.
    "God grant me the hbs to buy the ponies I need,
    The fortitude to resist the shiny ones I truly don't,
    And the wisdom to know there will always be more next time."
  • I'm so sorry for your loss.

    I'm adopted as well. My biological father's dad passed right before I was supposed to meet him as well. I still felt the loss even if I didn't know him. You're allowed whatever feelings you have. Nobody can tell you you aren't allowed to feel that way, and they shouldn't try. *Hugs*

    Warmest thoughts and big hugs.
    Thanked by 1CeffylDwr
  • Sorry for your loss, Ceffyl. I'd certainly say it's okay to mourn one you've never met. You still have some feelings for them! Loads of hugs your way!
    Love,
    Spry

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